Alienating Behaviours and Parental Alienation: Steps to Take

Whilst there is no single definition for alienating behaviours, it is recognised by the Children and Family Court Advisory and Support Service (Cafcass) and can be used to describe behaviour whereby one parent or carer expresses an ongoing pattern of negative attitudes and communication about the other parent or carer that have the potential or intention to undermine, or even destroy, the child's relationship with their other parent or carer.

The High Court has firmly acknowledged that some parents psychologically manipulate their children to undermine their relationship with the other parent, sometimes without malice or deliberate intent, and the courts are aware of the harm that this can cause. 

A child's feelings can be influenced by the parent they live with, who subconsciously or consciously alienates the child from the non-resident parent.

Alienation also occurs if a child has been deliberately coerced or pressured to align themselves to one parent by the other parent.

Either parent can demonstrate alienating behaviours. Indicators of alienation can include:

• One parent belittling or criticising the other parent
• Stopping a child from talking about the other parent
• Limiting or restricting contact without a valid reason
• Creating the impression the other parent does not love the child

It is important to note that alienation goes beyond expressing negative language and behaviour and can include withholding positive information, which ultimately influences a child's perception.

Cafcass recognises further alienating behaviours, such as spurning, terrorising, isolating, corrupting, or exploiting, and not responding appropriately to the child's emotional needs. These tactics can foster a false belief that the parent subject to the alienating behaviour is dangerous or unworthy.

Exposure to alienating behaviours harms children, and applying to the Family Court for a Child Arrangements Order may be necessary.

This way, the concerns can be formally investigated, and the court can consider how the child and parent can safely restore any relationship.