If you have separated or are in the process of separating, we understand that one of the most difficult aspects can be no longer seeing your child every day.
Understanding your rights and knowing what steps you can take if you and the other parent cannot agree arrangements for your child can feel overwhelming.
Below, our Family Law Solicitors have listed the number options available to help parents reach an agreement. The most appropriate option will depend on the individual circumstances of your case.
Speak to the other parent
If it is safe and appropriate to do so, speaking with the other parent could be the first step to discuss the existing arrangements.
You could both attempt to update or change the agreement so that any contact suits you both but also keeps the child's best interests in mind.
If there are handover or supervision issues, it may also be worth arranging for contact at a child contact centre or considering if a community based contact service could assist.
A contact centre or community-based service can assist with supervising or supporting contact, facilitating handover arrangements, and providing a neutral, safe place for the other parent and your child to meet and spend time together.
Contact centres can:
- Provide a safe and neutral location for children and parents to spend time together;
- Facilitate handovers between parents;
- Supervise contact where appropriate; and
- Support families in rebuilding or maintaining relationships.
The National Association of Contact Centres can provide further information.
Create a parenting plan
The Children and Family Court Advisory and Support Service (CAFCASS) provides guidance and support to separated parents, including a Parenting Plan template, and you can download the 'Parenting Plan' template from their website.
A parenting plan is a written agreement between parents that sets out how they will co-parent their child following separation.
The plan can cover:
- Living and spending time arrangements;
- School holidays and special occasions;
- Communication between parents;
- Education and healthcare decisions; and
- Financial arrangements relating to the child.
A parenting plan can help to provide stability for the child and creates a clear focus on the child's needs. It may also help avoid misunderstandings and reduce conflict.
Where difficulties arise, the Family Court will often expect parents to have attempted to resolve matters between themselves before commencing court proceedings.
A parenting plan can therefore be a useful starting point.
Family mediation
If direct discussions with the other parent about the time your child spends with you have not been successful, you may want to consider mediation.
Mediation works by helping parents who have decided to separate to talk things through with a neutral, independent third party.
Mediators are trained to help you discuss and agree on the best arrangements for the future.
Mediation helps you make informed decisions for your circumstances and helps children by helping separated parents work together to plan for their future.
Mediation can often be quicker, less stressful and more cost-effective than court proceedings.
The family court encourages parents to try mediation before issuing a Child Arrangements application as it is generally considered better for children when parents are able to resolve disputes themselves rather than arrangements being imposed by a judge.
If an agreement cannot be reached through mediation, you may wish to consider applying to the Family Court for a Child Arrangements Order.
Our experienced Child Law Solicitors can advise you throughout this process and assist with any court application.
What is a child arrangement order?
A child arrangement order (CAO) is an order that regulates the arrangements for a child including:
- With whom a child is to live, spend time or otherwise have contact
- When and how a child is to live, spend time or otherwise have contact with any person
Contact or time with a child can take a number of forms and may include:
- Direct contact, e.g. a few hours on certain days (especially for babies/younger children)
- Overnight staying contact
- Supervised contact, e.g. by a 3rd party or at a contact centre, as mentioned above
- Indirect contact, e.g. video calls, letters, or emails
When deciding whether to make an order, the court's paramount consideration is the child's welfare.
The court will generally presume that a child's welfare is furthered by the involvement of both parents in their life, unless there is evidence to the contrary.
A Child Arrangements Order will usually last until the child reaches the age of 16, although in exceptional circumstances it can continue until the age of 18.
Do I have to pay maintenance if I do not see my child?
Yes. Child maintenance and child arrangements are treated as separate issues.
Regardless of whether you spend time with your child, you will still have an obligation to contribute towards their financial support.
Child maintenance assists with the costs of raising a child, including expenses such as food, clothing, housing, activities, etc.
Child maintenance is assessed based on a percentage of the non-resident parent's gross annual income.
The amount payable will usually depend on:
- Your gross income
- The number of children you support; and
- The number of overnight stays the child has with you.
You can calculate how much child maintenance you may be expected to pay using the online child maintenance calculator.
If you cannot agree on the amount of child maintenance, either party can apply to the Child Maintenance Service to calculate the amount payable.
Contact Our Experts
You can contact our lawyers below if you have any more questions or want more information:
0161 941 4000
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Sarah Whitelegge
Legal Director
Sarah has over 17 years of experience acting as a Family Solicitor and as a Legal Director in our team. Sarah has specialist expertise in complex children matters and has experience of dealing with applications for child arrangement orders, prohibited steps orders, and special guardianship orders.
About Sarah Whitelegge