Supporting Your Children
If you are separating you will likely be worried about how you will tell the children.
Every child and family are different so think about your children and your family situation before doing anything.
If you feel that you can, it is good to try and speak to the children together. If you feel that talking to the children together may not be best, then speak to them separately but make sure that you agree in advance what you are going to say.
It is important that children need to know that the separation is not their fault and they need to be provided with the opportunity to talk about how they feel.
Children can react in different ways to divorce and they might feel sad, lonely, confused, or angry. Reassure the children that it is okay to be upset.
Tips for breaking the news to children:
- Use language the children will understand
- Let the children know you love them, and the separation is not their fault
- Tell the children how things will change from their point of view
- Let them know they can talk to you again or ask questions
- Remain in familiar surroundings after you have spoken to the children
It is important to try and maintain routines and normal activities for children as much as possible.
Speak to the children’s school and let them know what is happening, the school may have pastoral support or counselling services.
If you are worried that your child is struggling with anger issues or if they have signs of depression speak to your GP.
For more information check out ‘Talking to your kids about separation: A little guide for you to help your kids through a difficult time’ by Scott C Docherty.
You may benefit from attending a guidance meeting to gain understanding about the emotional stages of separation and telling your children about your separation. These guidance meetings take place in small group settings, either in person or virtually - Parenting Apart Information Meetings - Maura McKibbin
Why Choose A Resolution Member
The family team at Myerson are all members of Resolution, an organisation of family law professionals across England and Wales committed to working in a non-confrontational way and putting the needs of any children first.
Resolution has members who are lawyers, barristers, financial advisers, and family therapists. All members sign up to a Code of Practice which means that we will:
- Reduce or manage any conflict and confrontation
- Support families to put the best interests of any children first
- Act with honesty, integrity, and objectivity
- Help clients understand and manage the long term financial and emotional consequences of decisions
- Listen to and treat everyone with respect and without judgement
Members of our family team at Myerson have Resolution accredited status which means that they are recognised experts in a particular field of family law.
Nichola Bright has achieved specialist status in respect of finances and children matters and Sarah Whitelegge has achieved specialist status in respect of children matters and domestic violence.
We work with financial advisers and mediators who are members of Resolution. This means that they also respect the Code of Practice when working to resolve your issues.
How We Can Help
There are over 90,000 divorces each year according to the Office of National Statistics.
We understand that dealing with a divorce or separation is a very stressful time. Emotions can run high and the changes can be overwhelming.
The focus of Resolution’s good divorce week is to show separating couples how to manage a split in a non-confrontational and constructive manner putting the best interests of any children first.
Each day this week we will be sharing information about the process of divorce, the alternatives to court and how you can sort out the arrangements for the children, money, and the family home.
If you need to get in touch with us, then feel free to call us on 0161 941 4000 or get in touch via email.